Lets start with food, yes? Then I’ll get to the deep stuff. Ok, not so deep but working towards my 2011 Goals.
I must have turned off the thermostat in my sleep last night…or just forgot to turn it on, because when I woke up this morning my apartment was 51*F! No wonder Honey was underneath the covers when I woke up this morning!
So when I ran around trying to get the heater to work faster I figured I’d made the hottest breakfast on the planet, and proceed to burn my tongue beyond recognition.
Ok, the burn wasn’t that bad but it hurt. And it’s numb now, but the apple, pb and cranberry oats were totally worth it. No complaints there!
I headed out to the desert where I ran into a bunch of archeologists or anthropologists, I don’t know which one, but it gave for some fun entertainment…and blocked roads to my points way up on the hills. Arg…don’t people know that even though they’re on dirt backroads in the desert that some random person (ie ME!) would come down the road and need to pass by? Of course not.
In the midst of all my birding madness, I got hungry mid morning…I’ve noticed that my oats are no longer holding me over like they used to…and know of nothing else that my body uses to hold me over for more than 3 hours. Great.
So I ended up eating a Larabar that has been hiding and smashed at the bottom of my pack for a few months…I’ve been holding off on eating it because Larabars have always disappointed me, but after seeing my dad rave over how much he liked this flavor, I thought I’d give it another chance…hence into my belly went the pb&j Larabar.
The verdict? Not too shabby. I was digging the peanuty flavor but not the cherry as the “jelly” so much. I grew up with grape or strawberry jelly, but my favorite now is definitely raspberry. Larabar, can you make varieties of your pb&j bars? I’d buy it with raspberries! Alas, it’s gone now and one less bar I have to get rid of to start making my own to eat out in the field and reduce the amount of waste I produce (ie 2011 goal!)
I got finished a bit later than thought so lunch was later and I was starving at that point. I did end up munching on an asian pear on the drive home and immediately dug into my veggie avocado sandwich when I ran in the door. Yes, I literally ran into the apartment, and it may or may not have been to actually pee…tmi.
I stuffed my sandwich with 1/3 an avocado, some leftover butternut squash from my party this weekend, tomatoes and bit of pepper. It was divine…along with leftover strawberries.
I spent the afternoon doing work, taking pictures of Honey because I needed a break, eating too many cups of TJ’s Honey O’s and PB M&M’s, then going to the gym and working out on the elliptical and bike because I have two hellacious blisters on the inside of my heels on each foot. Does not bode well for my 1/2 marathon in oh, FIVE DAYS?!?!?!? ARGGGG!!!!
She kinda looks drugged. I promise, she’s not. Just sleepy. Or…
I did some strength training after I got home from the gym (abs and arms) and while I cleaned up I put Whit to work in the kitchen on a soup made mostly of the wonderful produce I got in my Abundant Harvest delivery this weekend!
I don’t have a precise recipe for this soup, but it included:
- veggie broth
- water
- Italian spices
- olive oil
- one onion, diced
- 5 cloves of garlic, diced
- small bundle of garlic chives, chopped
- one leek, chopped
- 1/2 a cabbage head, sliced
- one turnip, chopped
- one package of tempeh, blocked
Nom nom nom…Whit did a good job!
[[Side Notes: The Calorie Conundrum
As one of my 2011 Goals to stop counting calories, which basically rules my day and mood (kinda like the scale used to every morning when I stepped on it) I have been working one meal at a time to get past this activity.
I did well yesterday, not counting a single calorie that went in my mouth and felt good about it when I went to bed. I was doing well today until this afternoon when I got a bit carried away with some sugary cereal and m&m’s…which resulted in guilty and anxiety to set in.
I tried my hardest to keep calm about this, that it was just a minor slip up and something I should not let bother me, by stretching, reading and playing with Honey, but nothing was working. My brain was on over drive, having eaten these things and not knowing how many calories I had consumed. It doesn’t help that my feet are currently not in running condition so I couldn’t run and felt the absolute need to exercise.
Sadly I use exercise as a way to relieve this anxiety, because I’m “burning off the calories I’ve just eaten that I felt like I shouldn’t have.” I did head to the gym and did 2 miles on the bike before working out on the elliptical for 25 minutes and felt better, but still skimped out on my dinner (hello avoiding the tempeh and eating all that fiber filled veggies in the soup) as I felt it wasn’t enough.
As I write this, I’ve seen what I’ve done wrong. I’ve seen that the afternoon of getting carried away with those snacks was because I was tired and cold from working outside. I’ve seen that I don’t have to workout at the gym after that kind of anxiety and guilt but just need to turn to my friends/boyfriend to relieve the emotions overflowing in my head. I’ve seen what I can do next time to make sure this doesn’t happen, and if it does, what to do and what not to do to make it the safest thing for myself.
I know there are lots of you that have overcome the habit of counting calories…suggestions? What do you do to relax and get over an episode that might stress you out, cause anxiety or guilt? ]]
20 comments:
Lots of love. I know how the calorie counting goes and for me it's a really slippery slope. I'm trying to avoid it, too, this year.
Always here if you need some support.
that avocado sandwich looks heavenly! good luck on your new goals!
I'm still working on completely dropping the counting calories thing but 2 things help me a lot. First off, cooking from scratch. I try not to measure ingredients unless it's a very exacting recipe. It helps even more when multiple people are eating it so I don't really know what portion I've eaten. Those meals initially caused me some stress not knowing but it passed and it's so much easier to not count, at least for me, when it's not something packaged with a set calorie count. Even when I know that calorie counts of the components that extra step slows me down enough to stop myself usually if I start doing it unconsciously. And secondly, I don't let my guard down. If those numbers start to appear I do something, anything, else to distract myself. Once you start it's so much harder to stop yourself. Of course saying it is so much easier than doing it! But you can totally do it :)
As for managing stress, I could definitely use some pointers on that myself...
Although I never really counted calories, I did have to go through a lot in order to get the idea of calories out of my head. There is an interesting article about calories that I think you might find interesting, too. I'll email it to you :) Other than that, have you read the book on intuitive eating that Monica from run,eat, repeat talks about? That has really changed my attitude towards food and calories. I highly recommend it!!
xxx
<3 sending hugs and warmth your way. Those avocados look so good by the way...but they're 1.50 per cado @ the Trader Joes over here :[ haha...
*hugs* I find that two scrambled eggs with cheese and cooked squash along with a piece or two of toast usually holds me over for a good four hours or so. Oatmeal works almost as well, but the protein is what I need to really tie me over. Everyone is different in what they need though, but I thought I'd share what works for me.
Your apartment temps sound like my apartment temps! And my kitty sleeps with me too...a little, warm, purring body curled against me in bed.
Good luck with those blisters...have you tried putting moleskin around them? Cutting a hole for the blister in the moleskin? It may not help if they're really big, but it might relieve some of the pain. Yeah for Phoenix! I'm running a half at the end of February (eeek) and am doing most of my training indoors given all the ice we have around here from snow melt. Blech.
Oats don't keep me full either! And I'm not even doing anything active after I eat them! I'm sitting in class! But like clockword, 3 hours after eating them, my stomach is grumbling... I therefore *always* have multiple snacks packed!
no matter how much I try not to count calories, I know them ALL. So it's hard. When I KNOW I've over eaten (which happens a ton), I do tend to over do the exercise a bit the next day...a thing I've done is just try to breathe in and say tomorrow will be a better day and FORGIVE myself. :( Hell text a friend or me!
Counting calories is so ingrained in my mind that even though I don't flat-out count, I intrinsically know the ballpark amount in everything I eat. What's helped me is realizing that when I first stopped counting calories I actually LOST a few pounds- therefore there are days when I don't eat enough, and days when I eat more than my body needs. I know it's cliche to hear, but it really is true that the days balance out by themselves :) Stay strong girl- always here if you need to talk!
My New Month's resolution (I reevaluate them every month) is to not count calories as well. It's so difficult, especially when I eat a food that's not extremely healthy. It's almost like a switch that starts counting and adding up the calories to make sure I'm safe and to figure out how I need to adjust my day.
I've been doing pretty well this month, but of course, after an overindulgence in mixed nuts, I was mortified and needed to count up the calories and decide how to stop myself from eating the rest of the day. *sigh*
You can do it! It just takes some readjusting to our old habits. (:
PS. I used to cook in an egg or some egg whites into my oatmeal (microwave & stove work). It makes it fluffy and wonderful, plus an extra bunch of protein.
Thank you so much for this side note! I too am guilty of using an extra gym session to ease the anxiety from "overeating" (which likely is NOT overeating but seems like it to us). Lately I've been turning to yoga instead of an all-out gym session. It relaxes me and makes me feel like I'm doing something but is a step down from hopping on the treadmill to run for miles. Little improvements!! :)
Have you tried cooking your oats in skim milk/almond milk? For some strange reason, when I cook mine with milk and wheat germ along with my usual topping goods it keeps me fuller!
Stay strong girl. And seriously--DO NOT FREAK OUT about stuff like that. Do you practice yoga regularly? I'm a huge fan of all types. It's a great relaxer and greatly improves flexibility along with being a BLAST!
Oh...and I tagged you in my newest post "Jumping Bean". You should check it out!!
http://greensk8r-fireandice.blogspot.com
Follow my blog if you'd like!
:D
You will so rock that half! At least you're doing the bike and elliptical, those keep you in pretty good shape too. Don't worry too much about it, you will do fine (especially because blisters can heal that quickly, I had tons of them the last run I trained for).
As far as calorie counting goes... I really can't help you with that, as I have the same problem, along with the scale.
A.L.
Yikes, that's cold! My cats and dog always sleep under the covers when it's cold. Your oats look wonderful as always. Larabars are good, but they seem so small and I always eat them way to fast for the calorie count. The soup sounds wonderful.
It sounds like you're making great progress identifying what's wrong and not working. I hate that feeling of forcing myself to workout because I splurged, it's no fun and it gets in the way of quality time with loved ones being too consuming. Plus it's a great way to burn out on exercise and get over tired opening the doors for sickness. I really appreciate your honest posts and think you're doing great at conquering this, healing is a time consuming process.
I dropped calorie counting when I switched to a high-veggie, whole foods diet. Once I realized my body digested and used the foods I was eating differently than processed foods, I decided to never worry about counting again. Plus it's hard when most stuff I buy now is bulk foods and fresh produce that do not have nutrition facts. :-)
I can relate to how you feel. While I stopped counting calories, I still keep a mental rough estimate how much I eat. If I feel like I have gone over my "estimated" amount I will run an extra mile or eat less at dinner. It's difficult, I know, but we have to tell ourselves that "over indulging" one time isn't going to make or break us. I realize that this is easier said than done, and I still struggle with this. Hang in their girl... I'm with you. :D
Good luck with your 1/2! You'll rock it!
oye counting calories...i've done it for so long and feel like it keeps me from over eating, but sometimes I know I keep eating just because i seem to have calories left
I like this quote by Wayne Dyer:
"What's over is over. You did what you knew how to do. It wasn't right or wrong or good or bad. It just was."
I repeat this whenever I am beating myself up about something. Forgiving oneself is a powerful thing. You did it, accept it, move on. The end of the quote is, "All you've got is today. You can't have it back!"
I try SO HARD not to do that but sometimes.. it's hard when you know how many calories every freakin thing has. Sometimes it happens. And sometimes I have to literally force myself to stop thinking about it. That's all you can do! And you've come so far, i'm so proud of you!
Love you!
First off, the sandwich and berries look so good to me right now!
Second, Honey is the cutest!
Third, You know the old saying...one day at a time. I like that you're not "letting things go", but taking a look at what's bothering you and breaking it down.
I was probably the only anorexic who didn't count calories..most likely because I only ate a few food items. I limited on quantity, but never knew my caloric intake.
My advice would be maybe go for walk instead of going to the gym. The fresh air and quiet would probably be more helpful that the competitive atmosphere of the gym (for me at least).
Rome wasn't built in a day and you're doing so well!
Post a Comment